#all the information is in the task alex horne

[little-cereal-draws]

I started watching Taskmaster less than a year ago and it's helped my executive dysfunction so much. It is the ultimate "doing a minor task" hack.

A few of the ones I use a lot:

Wash your hair. Cleanest hair wins. Your time starts now.

Catch the bus on time. You must have everything in your backpack and have completed your morning routine before you leave. Person on the bus closest to the time it leaves, wins. You have an hour; your time starts now.

Wash and fold the laundry. Cleanest laundry wins. Your time starts now.

Complete the homework assignment. It must check all the criteria on the rubric. The Taskmaster will assess your answer on a scale of 0-100. Closest to 100 wins. You have two days; your time starts now.

Wash the dishes. Cleanest dishes wins. Your time starts now.

I know what this is not what Mr. Alex Horne had in mind when he made this show but it has improved my life so much

[thekeytomypie]

[ID: black text on a white background that reads "all the information is on the task (perverted)." There are two tiny little alex hornes on either side of the word "perverted," acting as parentheses. End ID]

[taskmastercaps]

[ID: Five screencaps from Taskmaster. Judi Love says, “No-one said we could do it on the floor.” Chris Ramsey says, “All the information was on the task.” Judi looks at him with her lips pursed in disgust. Greg Davies and Alex Horne point at Chris proudly. He points a finger gun back at them and winks. End ID.]

[unofficial-book-of-quotes-tm]

Jessica Knappett: Is there a time limit on this? Alex Horne: All the information's on the task, Jess. Jessica Knappett: Oh God, I've got five minutes! Alex Horne: Well, you've got 34 seconds.

Jessica Knappett, Alex Horne (series 07, episode 05: Lotta soup) Make as many white circles on the target as possible.

[triquery]

The Life Series and Casting Choices

[originally posted on the mcytsnark subreddit]

Like Any Reality TV Competition (and you would have to fistfight me to the death to classify the Life Series in a different way), there are two major production choices that determine the quality of the series. 1- The Rules/Premises (this is both the overarching rules of concept [like red-lives trying to kill people in the series] & for twists [like the boogeyman, soulmates, wildcards etc.]) & 2- The casting choices (who are the contestants, & if there are assigned teams; who's on what team?)

Unlike most RTVC's, the Life Series has largely the same cast every season. Let's discuss why, and how it impacts the series.

I say that the Life Series in unusual in having a consistent cast. What I mean more specifically is that it's unusual to have the contestants be so constant; most RCTV's have hosts/judges who remain with the series throughout years of seasons; Jeff Probst for Survivor, Greg Davies & Alex Horne for Taskmaster, RuPaul for RuPaul's Drag Race, Gordon Ramsey for Hell's Kitchen (& often Masterchef); but outside of All Star/Second Chance seasons, the competitors will be new people every season.

The Host is the Creator of the Premises (or the representative of the creator), & separate from the contestants in order to arbitrate/facilitate. The Life Series has no host, instead everyone participating is tasked with understanding & following the premises, & these premises are further carried out via mods & programming. Technically, ALL of the contestants are in-part fulfilling some of the function of the Host, which helps explain why they're all consistent presences.

But the thing is, the Life Series does have a Host. The Premises & Rules of each season don't come out of nowhere, Grian is obviously the Host. He's the one who created the series, he's the one giving the explanation at the beginning of each seasons, he's the one commissioning & testing the mods used to enact the rules. But the Host can't play in the game, so he distributed the role of Host amongst everyone participating.

For Grian to be able to play in the series, he needs to make others also participate in hosting, & for others to participate in hosting they should be consistent presences too. Because of this consistent competitor roster, most discussion about casting wrt the Life Series revolves around desired new members, & desired team-ups.

Traditionally, alliances/team-ups between players wouldn't actually be considered a Casting decision, However especially since Double Life, the usually gameplay-informed element of the Alliance has been transformed into a De Facto "Team" which contestants must work within. Double Life transforming the Alliance into a Host-backed Premise of being a Team very much informed future interpretation of play; I don't think it's a coincidence that since DL we haven't necessarily seen the sort of close-alliance-betrayals that happened in 3rd Life & Last Life (I'd love to hear counter-examples if you've gottem though)

Originally, I planned to be talking more about the specific members & whether or not I think they bring value to the series; but then I got too caught up in the framework lmao

[kinkyrius]

Erika Kohut speech bubble: [Alex Horne voice] All the information is on the task.

[mageless]

Typed out for @a4chocolate: a set of vague rules for a taskmaster drinking game. There are a few fun things you can pop in yourself that I've left out for the sake of my liver, such as "drink whenever Alex breaks character."

Taskmaster Drinking Game

Whole Lotta Pie…

Drink every time a contestant or member of the show says a key catchphrase! Examples include the classic Bosh, the Acaster BeBe, or the eternal and annoying “All the information is on the task.” Hell, drink twice for that one.

Another catchphrase is that of “your time starts now”, and if a contestant tries in any way to avoid saying it, then you should drink twice for that too.

Hello, James

As well as catchphrases, drink whenever a contestant carries out their own repeated bit in a task, such as when James Acaster refused to say hello to Alex at the start tasks, or when Joe Lycett stole items at the end of them.  

No, Just You!

Drink every time a contestant is burdened with a pointless and humiliating individual task.

Cheater

Drink every time a contestant cheats and is accordingly punished for it. I’m looking at you, Tim.

Big Spender

Not necessarily cheating, but certainly not good sportsmanship. Drink every time a contestant tries to buy their way around a task. Sorry, Al.

Thematic Items!

Ducks, Potatoes and Swedes oh my! Drink every time a thematic item is used in the course of the show. Examples include Ducks, potatoes, pineapples, Swedes (Hi, Fred), eggs, balloons, and coconuts, but different seasons may have their own season specific themes to look out for.

Powerful Homoeroticism, I really enjoyed it

Drink for whenever there’s a lovely bit of flirting sprinkled into the show, or for whenever Alex and Greg do whatever it is they do. I’ll leave it to you and whoever you’re drinking with to argue over what counts and what doesn’t.

This rule was originally made with Greg and Alex in mind, but was gradually expanded to cover any flirting within the show, mostly out of a deep love for Sally Phillips and everything she does.

Little Alex Horne

Drink for whenever anybody insults Alex, or implies him to be shorter than he is (difficult, considering he’s only 5’4 ☹).

Lore Update

Drink for any updates to the Taskmaster Lore TM. Mostly just for whenever Alex spouts the most insane shit known to man out of nowhere.

On Brand

Drink Whenever Alex gets undressed or is humiliated for the sake of the show. I’d say down your drink if you see his arse, but season 7 would be a nightmare.

Genuine Rage

Drink whenever a contestant gets quite genuinely angry, or whenever two or more contestants get into a genuine fight or argument.

A toast

Finally, down your drink for the winner of an episode. They deserve it, what with all they’ve been through and all.

Crossover Rule: Big If

Down your drink if Alex makes a no more jockey’s catchphrase on the show. This might happen more than I remember it though in which case just drink.

Crossover Rule: The Horne Section

Drink whenever the Horne section is mentioned on the show. If members of the band appear on the show, drink once for each member.

NSFW Rule: The Writers Barely Disguised Fetish

If you’re drinking with the kinds of friends amenable to it, then this is a fun rule. Whenever anything kinky happens in the show, a player can shout out the exact kink responsible, and everyone else has to drink.

[alexhornefan]

Taskmaster’s 15th season starts on Channel 4 next week. Here, Greg Davies and Alex Horne talk about this year’s batch of contestants, starting with Frankie Boyle.

People may be surprised that Frankie signed up.

Greg:  I think that’s a perfectly reasonable thing to be surprised about. He’s on it because his children like it.

Alex: He sometimes seems surprised that he’s on it as well. It’s unusual to see him without his dignity and not being in charge but he completely threw himself into it, partly because his kids are big fans, as Greg says, and partly because he really likes the show and I think he trusts us, luckily. But he had to wait 14 series to really be sure that we’d look after him and agree to do it! He’s got friends, people like Sophie Duker, who helped persuade him. It was really nice to see him be his normal self. He brought his kids into lots of conversations during the studio shoot so you see a tender side of him, which was nice.

Greg: I make a lot of jokes in this series about him not caring whether he wins or not but,  he really entered into the spirit of it. It’s not that he was sitting there going, ‘Who cares?’ He tried, and was often bad. It’s nice to see someone like Frankie being incompetent.

Alex: He’s always competent with his mouth though. The things he says are so brilliant.

Greg: He restores his dignity with every analysis… It’s kind of awkward having Frankie in the room to point out the facts. I might bluster over certain things sometimes, then people like Frankie come in and check the facts. But dictators need to be checked.

Alex:  These five actually feel like a really intelligent five. I don’t want to say that they’re more intelligent than others, but …

Greg:  But you are.

Alex: I am, yes. They’re much cleverer than anyone we’ve had. They’re led by Frankie, I think, when they’re arguing.

On the other hand, you’ve got him running around in his pants in one task.

Alex: That was all his idea. I think he was keen to put a stamp on the show. I think he decided: ‘Right, if I’m doing it, I’m doing it.’

Greg: It shows a different side to his creativity as well. His normal act is not a natural conduit for some of the things you see him doing and being naturally funny.

What about Ivo Graham: he’s quite chaotic and anxious, isn’t he?

Greg: Wilfully so.

Alex: He fits a bit into the David Baddiel or Mark Watson ‘intelligent man doing badly with practical things’ but he’s also got a real playful side. I think he’s in control of his badness.

Greg: He’s not cartwheeling out of control; he knows exactly what he’s doing. I don’t think he’s being bad on purpose – but when it’s evident that he’s being bad, he welcomes the chaos. He revels in his mistakes.

Alex:  He was desperate to win it because he knows the show inside-out. Most of his mates have done it and that desperation meant going charging into the tasks and then realising it was too late. He got all giddy and excited and never stopped to think. But he’s a really thoughtful person generally, so that was surprising.

Greg: I think he makes an assertion, he comes up with a plan, and he follows that plan through regardless of new information that might come in.   It’s a Bomber Harris approach to Taskmaster.

Alex:  When he does get in too deep, that’s fun. He’s prepared to go the extra mile more than anyone. He has quite a physical reaction to it. He’s a peculiar character. There have been moments of sadness with him but he has got his dignity as well.

Greg: It’s remarkable. He’s so naturally funny. He does a thing where he throws away a point wilfully in one of the live tasks. It’s one of the most surprising and funniest things I’ve seen on the show. That really wrong-footed me, that.

Alex:  Me too. He’s technically an unbelievably clever comedian.

And then there’s Ghosts star Kiell Smith-Bynoe​…

Alex: I think he’ll surprise people. He’s known as an actor, not as a comedian, but he’s thankfully a really funny person. And he’s got a face that lights up, a real twinkle.

Greg: I always say he adds value in some way to every task. There’s always a shimmy or flourish. He’s showbiz.

Alex:  Yes, he’s a showman. Even the clothes he’s wearing. He’s very likeable. 

Greg: He’s very competitive.

Alex: He’s had a problem with me as well on several occasions, which I found quite funny.

Greg: Which I’ve really enjoyed as well. They turn on me normally around show six, and my judgements get called into question. But he really has had it in for you since the beginning.

Alex: I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong. I have dobbed him in, but that’s my job. I could see you were getting beguiled by him and I had to stand up for justice. He did a few things badly but he managed to get things under the radar by being a bit showy, so I had to make sure you get the full picture.

 How would you describe his approach to tasks?

Greg: Route one.

Alex:  Yes. He’s got such a confused face.

Greg: And there’s a lot of fury.

Alex:  I think he thinks it’s all against him. He doesn’t realise there’s four other people doing it too.

 And Jenny Eclair?

Alex:  She had the time of her life, both in and out of the studio. The whole show is meant to be doing stuff you did as a kid that you don’t do any more. She’s really throwing herself into it.

Greg: You can really see the inner child in her, and I found it so gleeful. There was one task where she just went, ‘fuck, yes!"’I think there’s genuine glee there. It’s not performance. She’s doing it for herself.

Alex:  She’s quite anti-establishment as a person, so this is a good way of breaking rules and not giving a shit.

Greg:  She’s very, very funny and quite chaotic.

Alex: If you say to her, ‘What do you think of the Nissan Micra?’ she’ll have a story about it, in the same way Greg often has a story for most occasions. She’s got an amazing memory for details.

 Do you think people will be surprised by her?

Greg: I don’t know how people have perceived her in more recent years.

Alex: I’m just really pleased that people will see her being funny on telly, because she should be on telly more. You’re seeing the true Jenny, I think.

Greg: And carefree. Not being associated with being grumpy and menopausal. What she is on our show is someone who loves life. She spends a lot of time laughing.

Alex: She had a grandchild during the filming. It’s quite nice when Taskmaster fits around people’s lives, and you can see their lives in the show. Her grandson has come up to the show a couple of times. I do like that.

Finally, Mae Martin…

Alex:  Yes, they’re quite hard to pin down because they had a really good approach to the tasks, almost more than anyone. They read it and think, ‘Yes, I know how to do this.’ They sometimes think they’re taking it too seriously.

Greg: But we like that, don’t we? They’re quite forensic in the way they approach tasks. But then there are flashes of mischief: understated mischief. And they’ll often throw in a very clever call-back or a very witty line.

Alex: They’re very good at bending the rules and going the extra mile. Also, it’s worth mentioning they were much better by themselves than with the team. They found it quite frustrating to be with their team. And that was really funny. Also Mae is really good friends with Charlotte Ritchie and Kiell, so it’s good to see someone who’s had history with the show and came in with a slight mindset. I like that.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

RIP Hypothetical - it was a good idea, Crosby, but you had to know the celebrity wall was the worst part of it, right? I've been giving enough credit to the writers and showrunners to assume that they do know the thing where they bring in celebrities to answer questions was weak compared to the rest, and only kept leaving it in because having celebrities from outside the comedy industry is a good way to increase a TV show's mass appeal. After every season, I said it has great potential but they need to tweak the format, and a big part of what I meant by that (not the only thing I meant, but a big part of it) was "Trust your own ideas and drop the celebrity wall". I guess they finally ran out of chances to tweak it.

Having said that, there are exceptions to every rule. For example, the rule: "the celebrity wall is by far the worst part of Hypothetical" has the exception: that one time when they had Mark Lawrenson on their celebrity wall and noted war criminal fan Matt Forde had to answer questions about him, that was one of the funniest things to ever happen on show. Extra funny because everything I know about Mark Lawrenson (outside of this clip) comes from the Russell Howard and Jon Richardson radio show, on which Matt Forde was a frequent guest in its later days and became a regular after Russell left, and they talked about Mark Lawrenson all the time on that show, so Forde should really have known his basic biographical information. I mean, I fucking knew he was Irish, and I learned that information from a radio show that Matt Forde was frequently on.

So RIP Hypothetical, and I believe it's right to mark its cancellation by posting this clip again.

"I really like Adele, and I quite like Stonehenge." - Kerry Godliman

I've posted this clip a few time before, but I don't know if I've previously acknowledged the lovely work of Josh Widdicombe and James Acaster - especially Josh, I think - to not let on that he'd picked anything wrong until it was too late to change it. I always enjoy that, watching comedians on TV shows where you can see them realize something amazing is happening, but they have to act like everything's normal, because that's the best way to let it play out.

You see Alex Horne do this during Taskmaster tasks a lot, and it's one of the things that makes Taskmaster great. The way, when a contestant is really fucking up or just missing something obvious, you can feel Alex Horne and the entire Taskmaster crew holding their breath, hoping the comedian won't notice and they can get the footage that has just become possible. You can see Josh and James do a bit of that in this clip, until finally, Matt Forde has locked his answer in, and they get to remind him that the guy is Irish.

[league-of-sam]

As Grim as the Reaper | Simon 'GHOST' Riley PREQUEL

Ghost x Reader, Graves x Reader

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Phillip Graves x AFAB!Reader!OC 18+ MINORS DNI! t.w // angst, mental health, language, violence, death, sexual themes/SMUT, military inaccuracies, language inaccuracies (google translate).

As Grim as the Reaper: Masterlist

Walking through the halls of the huge base, your head hung low.

Lights were dimly lit, and the place was practically empty. It was way past hours now, but you'd chosen to stay, occupying your mind.

There was still no news on Alex - he was still missing in action, presumed dead, and the information weighed heavy on your heart. 

It felt like no one was doing a fucking thing to find him. You'd spoken to Farah countless times since it had happened, and she was hurting just as much as you.

You couldn't help but blame yourself a little. If you could have held on, if you didn't get injured when you did...if you were able to have continued the mission, maybe he wouldn't have had to sacrifice himself.

But it was no good to dwell on a bunch of fucking what if's. 

That's why you'd stayed late, trying to occupy your mind with the mounds of paperwork you had to go through (one thing no one told you about in this job).

You hadn't heard from John in days, but you knew he was busy in setting up his new task force; 141. Your brother, the captain of his own task force. The thought made you swell with pride. But he was late for your arranged call, and it made you worry.

Then there was Laswell, being sent here, there and everywhere to sort out a multitude of messes across the globe.

So you were alone, and on your birthday, no less.

You continued walking in the direction of the break room - footsteps almost silent on the tiled floor after taking your boots off some hours earlier -  desperate for a good cup of tea, when a light caught your attention, more specifically, the light to the room you were going to stop at on your way.

Sneaking up, you peered through the almost open door, finding Phillip Graves sat at his desk, hunched over a similar mound of papers.

One hand rested on the side of his head, propped up by his elbow, while the other scrawled words, knuckles white from the grip he held on the pen. 

The light was coming from the single desk lamp, angled to shine over him, illuminating his blonde hair and casting dark shadows over his features. The sight had you lick your lips a little - you'd be a fool to ever deny that the Commander of Shadow Company was attractive.

In all truth, he was bloody gorgeous, a classic southern gentleman.

You'd also be lying if you said his incessant flirting over the last year you'd spent in Special Ops hadn't been slowly (quickly) wearing you down, especially after the way he'd not left your side in the last months.

Smirking, you pushed the door wider, stepping into the room.

"Ya gonna kill me if I put this on your pile, Commander?" You spoke.

Graves looked up, almost agitated that someone had disturbed him, until he was met by your sweet voice and pretty face. Then, his shoulders relaxed, his lips curling into a soft smile.

"Do it and find out, princess." He challenged.

His response made you giggle, and so, placing the folder behind your back, you tiptoed over until you reached his side of the desk, and added it to his never-ending stack. 

After a moment, you released a dramatic breath, perching on the desk next to him, "Well, would ya look at that, I'm still alive!"

He chuckled, leaning back in his chair, looking up at you. 

Now, you had a full view of what he was wearing; dark jeans held up by a leather belt with an obnoxiously large concho depicting a horned bull. Tucked in neatly was a grey cotton shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, with the first few buttons undone.

Such a cowboy.

"So you are." He smirked at you. "You know it's almost 10, right? The hell are y'still doin' here?"

"Same as you." You shrugged.

"See, now I know you're lyin' to me. Ain't no way you've got enough paperwork to keep you here as late as me. Talk to me."

He'd been there for you through it all the last couple of months. So much so, he'd gotten to know you a little too well. All of your little quirks, mannerisms, the way you carried yourself. He could read you like a book.

You cocked your head, drinking in his features, "First of all, I actually do have tonnes of paperwork. I'm applying for a promotion, so there."

"You are?"

"Yeah. Alex always said I'd be a good leader, thought maybe it was time to do it. For him."

"That's great, you'll make an incredible lieutenant."

"You think so?" You blushed, and he nodded, smiling softly at you.

"Absolutely...Lieutenant Reaper. S'fuckin' hot."

You rolled your eyes with a shake of your head, "Shut up."

He chuckled, holding his hands up in mock defeat, before rubbing a finger over his lips, coming to rest on his chin, "That ain't what's bothering you, though, so what is?"

"Do you ever get lonely here?"

Your question shocked him; the last thing he expected you to admit to him was that you were lonely. 

Yeah, he knew how much losing Alex was hurting you, and despite his ill-feelings towards the guy, he knew you loved him, and so it pained him too. 

But...he never thought you'd feel like this. You were too beautiful, too sweet, too kind to feel lonely, and he was kicking himself for not doing enough to help you through that.

"Graves?" You spoke, leaning a little closer, pulling him out of his thoughts.

"Uh- y-yeah...yeah. I guess it can be pretty lonely here sometimes, but I just go find one of my guys, they're usually up for hitting the bar for a few or using the foosball table in the break room."

"Right."

"That what's up?" He leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees, "You feelin' lonely?"

You nodded, almost ashamedly. "Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty accustomed to it by now, after losing my parents when I was a kid. But sometimes it gets the best of me- fuck, I'm sorry, I shouldn't be unloading this on you-"

Moving to leave, you were stopped, a hand softly gripping your wrist, pulling you back just that little bit closer.

"I don't mind. You don't gotta apologise to me, I asked, I wanna know."

"It's hard. I've only been here a little over a year. I miss Alex...I fucking refuse to believe he's dead. No way."

"You spoke to anyone about it?"

"Farah called last night...she's hurting. I know she loved him." You sighed, running a hand through your hair, pulling at the tangles, "And then John- I've not heard from him today."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Not usually, we both understand that we can get busy with this work, but he never misses this day...never. If we're apart, he always calls, he always makes time."

"What's so special about today?"

You smiled a little, playing with the loose strings on the rope bracelet on your wrist; a simple black bracelet with a single charm of a bucket hat. It had been your present from John the year before.

"It's my birthday."

Graves looked at you with wide eyes, waiting for you to say you were joking, but you didn't, and so his jaw dropped. You were lonely on your birthday?

Not on his fucking watch.

He stood up, and you jumped back a little, before he grabbed your hand and his wallet, dragging you to the door.

"Phillip, what the fuck are you doing?" You laughed, trying to resist.

"I'm doin' what's right. No way am I lettin' you feel lonely on your birthday! We're goin' t'get pizza."

"No, we're not."

"Yes, we are."

"We have paper work to do!" You protested.

"That can wait! You're not going any longer without celebrating, not on my watch." 

"Phillip Graves!" You yelled, making him halt, "That form has to be complete by tomorrow, I have to do my paperwork!"

He thought for a moment, pursing his lips, before dropping your hand, "Stay here."

Graves didn't give you chance to answer before he was jogging down the hall, disappearing around the corner. You let out a confused giggle, but decided to stay right where he left you. Barely two minutes later, he reappeared, wheeling your chair in front of him, where your considerably smaller stack of paperwork rested.

"What are you doing?" You laughed.

He panted as he approached you, pushing past until he stopped the chair next to his own, "We're still gettin' pizza, but now, you don't gotta do your work alone. Ya can sit here with me, okay, darlin'?"

You bit your lip to suppress the giant smile that wanted to break through, crossing your arms over your chest. The gesture was incredibly sweet, and it made your cheeks burn pink.

"Okay, fine. You got me."

He took your hand once more, leading you to the break room, where he had you set up the pool table as he ordered a pizza for you to share.

There, you talked, laughed, played several games of pool as you waited on the pizza, until it arrived and you strolled back to his office.

The two of you sat close, the pizza being devoured quickly before you began on the paper work. Every now and then he'd nudge you playfully, and you'd laugh, shoving him back. Being around Phillip Graves was fucking easy, too easy.

And subtly, you edged your seat ever so slightly closer to him, until your knees were rubbing together under the desk.

Maybe this birthday wasn't so lonely after all.

You had to admit, it was nice not to have to do your paper work alone. Sitting beside Graves in his dimly lit office, pizza box half-heartedly discarded, was comforting.

It felt...right.

By now, you were the only ones left on the entire base, save for the security. It felt quiet and private, despite you being sat at work.

With a slam of your pen, you let out a gleeful yelp as you shot your hands into the air, signalling your triumph at yet another bet.

"And I beat you again, Commander."

"God damn it! I have no idea how you women write so fast, my hand's all crampin' up!" He said, massaging his palm.

You pouted mockingly, "I told you that you couldn't handle it, I kicked your arse, again."

Standing up, you moved over to the bin, tossing some of your scrapped papers in there.

"Excuse me?"

"Beat ya, just like I did at pool." You shrugged.

"You didn't fuckin' beat me!" He accused.

"Yeah, I did."

"No you didn't!"

"Oh, but I did!" You sang, a smug smile on your face. "Not my fault you turn everything into competition!"

You took his silence as defeat, and began revelling in yet another win, but a faint gasp left your mouth as you turned to find him directly behind you, the fright causing you to stumble. He reacted quicker than you did, grabbing hold of you before you could go toppling over.

You had him pressed against the file cabinets that lined the back wall of his office, leaning against his body slightly. Both your hands were firmly on his chest as you'd braced yourself for the fall that never came.

His breath fanned your face from how close you were, the tips of your noses practically touching.

"You fallin' f'me now?" He whispered with a smirk.

His tongue darted out of his mouth, wetting his bottom lip, preparing himself to return whatever snide remark he'd expected you to say, only for his actions to freeze when you whispered back.

"I think so."

His eyes widened, and he watched the blush creep onto your cheeks as you looked up at him, eyes big and doe-like. One of his hands was light on your hip, while the other raised, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

Your eyes flicked to his lips, as his did the same, and you leaned closer.

Closer.

Almost there.

[jcmarchi]

Alex Horne On Taskmaster VR And Being A One-Man Writing Room

New Post has been published on https://thedigitalinsider.com/alex-horne-on-taskmaster-vr-and-being-a-one-man-writing-room/

Alex Horne On Taskmaster VR And Being A One-Man Writing Room

Long-running British comedy panel TV game shows are not something we usually cover here at Game Informer (a magazine and website devoted to informing readers about video games), but Taskmaster, the long-running British comedy panel TV game show, is getting a video game adaption. The Taskmasters themselves, Greg Davies and Alex Horne, will be represented in-game, and Horne, who created the concept of the show and is technically its sole writer (see below) was available to chat about it. We learned about the upcoming VR game (releasing June 13 on Quest), why the American Comedy Central version of the show didn’t work, whether or not it is time to give an American version another shot, and what it is like to meet yourself in VR. So without further ado… it’s little Alex Horne!

Game Informer: Do you play video games? Are you a fan at all?

Alex Horne: No, not really. I used to have an Amiga when I was growing up in the 80s. I do have a Quest and I did play it a little bit during lockdown. I played it quite a bit. I found it useful for that. But I’ve got three boys, three kids who are 11, 13, and 14, so my job is to tell them to stop playing computer games and go outside. But they do play a lot. They play a lot of Roblox and Minecraft and Fortnite. But I’m not a gamer, so this has been a whole education for me.

But you’ve played Taskmaster VR, right?

I have. I’ve had a demo. I’ve dipped my toe into it. It’s too weird, though, for me to play. To meet myself in it and be a contestant. It reminded me of the very first time I put on the VR headset, or even put it on my mum, as well. It blows your mind the very first time. It was like that, again, going around the Taskmaster house, in particular, was so eerie. It’s so lifelike. Not lifelike, because it’s obviously cartoony, but it’s so well drawn and faithfully recreated.

The Taskmaster house is there and you can walk around? It’s accurate?

It’s so accurate. Sort of unnecessarily accurate. The house itself in real life is disappointingly small. It’s a bungalow. There’s only one floor. There’s only about five rooms. So, we could do anything with the house. But instead, we’ve absolutely faithfully recreated the Taskmaster House [laughs]. But it’s amazing. You can open every cupboard, and you’ll see things from the show. There are lots of Easter eggs, things hidden around that are irrelevant. And all the rooms are pretty much the right dimension, we’ve had to slightly swell the corridor in the kitchen, because they’re narrower in real life. It is great. And also, there’s so much potential. In the real house in the real world, there’s a door that opens and has nothing behind except for a green screen, which gives us potential… we’ve never really used it. But similarly in the VR house, you could open a door and end up in a different location.

[embedded content]

Is the stage in the game, as well?

Yeah. You end up in the studio. And it’s like the TV studio. So if you look around, you’ll see the cameras, and where the audience sits, and you’ll see Greg [Davies] on the throne. The team have been to the house a lot and they’ve measured up and they’ve taken pictures, you know, like estate agents would. And they’ve been to see the live show. They’ve tried to make it, so if you’re a fan of the show, it’ll be really exciting to be in the world. And hopefully, if you’re not a fan of the show, it’s a… VR games are so weird. The ones I know, it feels like either Star Wars, that’s brilliant, or that job one where you’re doing something really menial, and this is hopefully somewhere in between the two. So they are quite practical, simple tasks, but you’re in a fantastical world.

I imagine this would be hard for you to answer: did they get your height correct in VR? If I play the game, do you tower over me?

I don’t know what height I am anymore. I’ve lost all sense of that. You know, if you Google a Hollywood actor and try to find out how tall Johnny Depp is, you’ll never get the right answer. And I think it’s the same with me. I can’t find the right answer. So, I think I’m smaller in VR. I should be small in VR. It’s the correct Taskmaster height for me.

Did you come up with any tasks specifically for the game? Did you give the team ideas?

It was a collaborative process. And, to be honest, the team – Scallywag Arcade – came up with things and they quite nervously put them to me and I may have tinkered with them, but they know computer games. I know Taskmaster games. And we sort of met in the middle. So, they came from them and I’ve absolutely given them all the seal of approval.

There’s a tiny bit of me that… tasks are quite precious for me, without sounding too serious, there’s only a certain number. I’m worried I am going to run out one day. There’s certain things I’ve come up with which are so good because for me it’s not all about the task. It’s about the little layers. For example, your time starts when you’ve done a thing. You said  a certain word or whatever. And they’ve come up with some great ideas. For example, your time doesn’t end unless you don’t put the thing in a box. I’m not sure if I’m being very clear, but they’ve completely got the Taskmaster language and ideas. So yeah, I’ve collaborated, but I can’t take responsibility for all the games.

One of my favorite things about the show – and I don’t know how you guys feel about it, honestly. It’s hard to tell as a viewer – but I love when the contestants smudge the rules to get around a task.

Are there opportunities to do that here? Because sometimes videos games have to be rigid in order to work. Is there room for that in Taskmaster VR?

That’s one of the real challenges. We definitely want that. Well, what you can’t necessarily do is sort of nitpick the language quite so much. But there’s definitely multiple ways around [a task]. So, the whole point for me of a good task is there might be three or four ways of doing it. And then one or two ways we haven’t thought of which is on the verge of cheating, but it’s not. It’s just a clever workaround. And yes, we hope that’s built into the game.

On the verge of cheating. That’s a great way to put it.

I’m really hoping we watch people do things that we didn’t think, or we discover that people have done things in a completely different way than what we expected.

Are there any quintessential tasks from the show? Like really popular tasks that had to be in the game?

No. It’s the opposite of that. One of the things we pride ourselves on in the show is that we never repeat a task. So, when you open the envelope, you have no idea what it’s going to be.

Here’s the thing. When we did Taskmaster America – we did one ill-fated series for Comedy Central – and I think one of the mistakes we made was that we repeated all the tasks. They were ones we’d done in England. And it just felt like we were treading water a bit and it wasn’t exciting. We should have taken much more of a risk and done brand new tasks. And that’s what we decided to do with this. We don’t want players to go, “Oh, well I know what to do with this one. I’ve seen five people do it.” So, it’s all brand new. There’s elements of tasks that we love from the show, but there’s nothing taken directly from the show.

I will admit, I was hoping… one task that I love was when you had all the contestants blindfolded and they drove a moped around a parking lot.

Yeah, by the the railway museum.

Is there anything like that in the VR game? I love the idea of like you being blindfolded in VR and having to perform a task.

Well, it’s an ongoing project, I don’t think there’s a blindfolded one in there, but I might be told otherwise by the devs. I don’t know how that would work. That’s a great idea. Do you mind if we steal your idea that you’ve stolen from us?

Please. Everything’s a circle, right?

I mean, you can blindfold yourself. You can do whatever you want. But um, yeah. It’s a good idea. Thank you.

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What does the writing room look like for Taskmaster? How does that work?

I’m afraid you’re looking at the writing room.

Just you?

It is, yeah. It’s quite stupid because most comedy shows do need a writing room. But from the very beginning it was just me. And actually, most of the team that make the show, it’s still the same people – producer and director and some of the team. So, people do chip in with ideas, but it’s kind of me and I’m a bit precious about it and a bit control freak, I suppose. Because I think it’s quite delicate to get the right balance of being interesting, but not crazy and kooky. So, yes, pretty much me.

In New Zealand they have got a team. Sometimes I’ll watch it and think, “Oh, yeah, we should get a team.” But I don’t want to let it go. We get suggested a lot of tasks by the public, but very rarely, seldom, do they come up with one that’s actually good.

I imagine it’s more complicated than you think.

It is. And also, we thought of most things now, because we’ve done 18 series. That’s a lot of tasks, you know, it’s 600, or whatever it is. So, most of the time people will suggest something and we’ll say,“We tried that. It didn’t work.” Or, “We have actually done that.” So the writing room is just me and my dog.

Do you think it’s time to give an American reboot another shot?

I think so. We learned a lot from that. I think what we should have done is brought Greg over, we should have new things, and we should have made it the same length as the UK show. We agreed to everything that Comedy Central said, because we thought they knew best. And I’m sure they know best in lots of ways. But I think we if we did it again, we would stick to our guns a bit more.

Taskmaster VR releases June 13 on Meta Quest.

[meeedeee]

Hate to Say I Told You So [Vid]

Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF

No Archive Warnings Apply

Alex Horne (British Comedy RPF)

Fanvids

Alex Horne Being a Little Shit

All The Information Is On The Task

Gonna get through your head what the mystery man said Because I'm gonna

(Feed generated with FetchRSS) source https://archiveofourown.org/works/46716184

[toyboy-molloy]

been watching taskmaster and I just love it when contestants get snarky at alex because he does ask for it sometimes

[taskmastercaps]

[ID: Three screencaps of Judi Love on Taskmaster, sitting at a table holding a piece of paper. From off-screen, Alex Horne says, “All the information’s on the task.” Judi inspects the other side of the paper. Stony-faced, she holds it up, saying, “There’s no more information.” End ID.]

[jameszmaguire]

All the information is on the task.

TASKMASTER (2015 - )

+ bonus: Little Alex Horne, who, despite having invented the show and being in it the most, fittingly didn’t actually make it into this tribute gifset

(P.S. Open this gifset in a new tab for all the gifs to sync up. Your time starts now.)

[nostarsfornaughtyboys]

Alex on the Taskmaster Podcast

Ed: There’s gotta be some friction.

Alex: Yeah, you need stuff to grind against.

(No, I will not provide any context - ed. As in editor. Not Ed Gamble. This might get confusing.)

*

Alex: I haven’t had a shower yet today.

Ed: OK, good, this is all good information, good to know. But you’ve got a footie shirt on.

Alex: I did some exercise. In the garden with my dog. Yeah. I went to do some sort of running around in the garden, like, and...my neighbours, I think, watch. But my dog stole my shoe.

*

Alex *of Josh waiting till his turn in the prize task to complain about being set the solo task of singing along powerfully to the Taskmaster theme tune*: I like that that was bubbling away in his little head for ages.

(Alex’s quiet little sadistic tendencies showing - ed.)

*

Ed: And also, Greg can do what he wants, can’t he?

Alex: Yes, you say that to his face. He would say he can’t do what he wants. He has to do what he thinks people want him to do.

Ed: Right. But he never does.

Alex: And then he’s racked by guilt. No. And he’s not getting any better.

Ed: Still feels guilty about doing stuff?

Alex: Yeah, still feels guilt, and still makes incredibly irrational but also unmathematical decisions. It still bugs me when he goes, ‘Yeah, five points, two people get four points, and then the next person should get two.’ Anyway.

Ed: You can always see you get flustered with your iPad.

*

Ed: Well, it made me laugh the most.

Alex *deadpan*: Did it, now. That’s not the category, Ed.

*

Alex *of Greg and David Jason*: They have a really lovely, awkward relationship.

*

Alex: There are some secret things in the house, not all of which have ever been found.

(OMG, I need to know - ed.)

*

Ed: That would have panicked me too much, counting the rice.

Alex: Everything would have panicked you too much.

Ed: Well that’s true.

Alex: That’s true, Alex. Alex.

*

Alex: It’s always worth noting that that is somebody’s job. To count out the grains of rice to put in that drawer. And if they get it wrong...the fury that I possess.

*

Alex: So well done, Josh. I think he’s proud of himself. I love it when he’s proud of himself.

Ed: Yeah. You can tell. He wears all his emotions on his little face, doesn’t he?

*

Alex: I’d be a completely different person if I could do impressions, I think. It would change me. It would give me so much more ballsiness.

*

Alex: I’d love to do an American.

Ed: Any particular American?

Alex: Maybe a cowboy?

(Again, no context allowed - ed.)

*

Alex: Smashing things is probably the best thing, isn’t it?

Ed: Oh god, it’s great. 

(Such butch, manly men - ed.)

*

Ed: You’re absolutely obsessed with putting yourself in situations where you have to eat potentially disgusting things, aren’t you? (FINALLY someone has the guts to say it to his face - ed.)

Alex: I’m not. I’m not absolutely obsessed. *goes on to justify his oral fixation with a palindrome, which might be the most Alex Horne thing ever to happen*

*

Ed *of having to eat an edible mask off Katherine Ryan’s face*: I mean, obviously you feel uncomfortable in any situation like that, really, don’t you, Alex?

Alex: Well also, when she lay there, like, she looked like, you could imagine a model in Cosmopolitan doing that as a photoshoot. 

Ed: Yeah.

Alex: Cos she’s so...she was so still, as well. 

...

Alex: Also, it looked like either she was asleep or dead or something. So I was creeping up to her like this horrible man going to lick a sleeping model. Oh god.

Ed: Yeah, you’re remembering it and feeling just as uncomfortable now, which I love.

...

Alex: And I don’t know if there was a good way of doing it, if I’d just sort of marched up and gone in for a munch. I think you have to tiptoe up. Er... *regretfully* ...Yeah.

Ed: Yeah, you definitely have to tiptoe up. But obviously you didn’t go for the lips, but you mentioned them, which made it worse.

Alex: Well it also looked delicious, all the food, and I had a job to do, I had to taste the mask.

*

Alex: I do understand that my discomfort is funny. You can’t fake discomfort, but you can sort of milk it slightly.

*

Alex: I’d like to think that I asked permission as well, before licking her face. I probably said to her, I don’t know if it’s on camera or not, do you want me to use a spoon or a tongue.

(Seems legit - ed.)

*

Alex *of Josh’s Alex Horne mask*: Every detail was accurate. Right down to the long, sugary-sweet tongue.

...

Alex: That was the one I was least embarrassed about, gobbling on my own face, I think.

Ed: Cos I suppose you’re always sort of eating your own face in a way.

Alex: Me specifically?

Ed: No, but everyone is always eating their own face cos they’re always in their own mouth, technically.

Alex: ...Well I don’t want to argue with you on this, but I completely disagree.

Ed: Why do you disagree?! In your mouth is you.

Alex: I don’t think everyone is always eating their own face. In my mouth is not me.

Ed: Well who is it, then?! The inside of your mouth is part of you. You’re in your own mouth.

Alex: Right, I will concede that in my mouth is me, but I don’t think I’m eating my own face all the time.

Ed: But you’re swallowing and stuff, and like, your tongue’s in your mouth, so you’re always having a little chew on your tongue, right?

Alex: Fine. OK. Well I concede that I’m always licking me. I’m always licking the inside of me. But I’m very rarely licking the outside of me.

*

Ed *of Alex’s beard*: It’s nice and trimmed. I like it.

*

Alex *of Bob Mortimer’s mask*: I also was nervous, first of all, of eating my hero’s face. But because he pulled me in and kept saying that he’d sinned and that I could cure him, I really got into eating his mask.

(...Alex. Mate. - ed.)

*

Alex: A sneak preview for Series 13 - there’s more saliva in one task than we’ve ever had before. 

...

Alex: Honestly, you won’t believe it. The editors struggled with it as well, just seeing it. I can’t wait till you see that.

*

Alex *of Josh tidying up after himself*: He tried really hard, the little...little boy.

Ed. Little boy, nice little boy.

*

Alex: I try to ease off the blindfolds so that they only appear once a series.

*

Alex *of his little assistant suits*: I have worn them to a funeral.